By: Mary M. Byers

If you struggle with premenstrual syndrome (PMS) each month, you're not alone. According to WebMD, up to 85% of women experience symptoms of PMS ranging from backaches and headaches to irritability, depression, feeling overwhelmed and outright rage. For moms the emotional symptoms can be the most troubling because what affects you also affects your family. The good news is that there is help. Follow these tips to reduce the chances that you'll turn into Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Hyde each month.

Chart your symptoms for three months. Use a blank calendar page to note the beginning and end of your menstrual cycle and jot down your symptoms prior to, and during your period.  Do this for three months or longer so you can see your personal pattern emerge. The longer you do it, the better your information will be. I've charted my own cycle for so long that I can actually pinpoint my darkest days in advance!

Recognize that knowledge is power. Use what you've learned about your cycle to change your PMS response. Schedule more lightly on your toughest days. Ask for help from friends or your spouse when you know your patience will be at its lowest. Don't make decisions when you're feeling overwhelmed or depressed. Based on your own symptoms, you'll be able to Identify other tactics that will help you cope when you are least able to.

Identify your triggers. If grocery shopping with your kids when you have PMS makes you crazy, don't do it. If meal time is difficult for you when you are irritable or feeling blue, ask to be excused once a month (and let your hubby make pancakes!).  If acting as homework proctor stresses you when you have PMS, ask an older child or your spouse to step in. Though you may feel you're shirking your responsibilities, it makes more sense to have an alternate plan than it does to set a bad example by having a meltdown in front of your children every month.

Use free coping techniques first. The following remedies are free and easy to use when it comes to changing your PMS response each month:

Stress Reduction: PMS symptoms are exacerbated by stress-and what mom doesn't have stress? Schedule yourself and your family more lightly when you have PMS and don't try to do too much. Utilize carpooling if it will help reduce your burden when you're premenstrual and put off making difficult decisions during this time when you can.

Exercise: Increasing the amount you exercise when you have PMS is a great way to combat some of the more difficult symptoms such as depression and sadness. Exercise elevates serotonin (a neurotransmitter that allows nerve cells to communicate with one another) which influences a wide range of functions, from movement to mood. Exercise also increases endorphins which also positively enhance mood. Even as little as a walk around the block can be beneficial in combating PMS symptoms.

Sunlight: Lack of sunshine can cause a drop in serotonin. Though too much exposure to the sun can be unhealthy, just minutes a day can help keep serotonin balanced. Get outdoors as often as possible. When walking, look straight ahead rather than down at the ground when you walk. This will increase the amount of light that enters your eyes, the primary way your body senses exposure.

Sleep: Though sleep is important all month long, when you're premenstrual you may experience some of these sleep-related challenges: insomnia (difficulty falling asleep, staying asleep, waking up too early, or unrefreshed sleep), hypersomnia (sleeping too much), and daytime sleepiness. Adequate sleep encourages serotonin production; lack of sleep lowers it. To encourage sleep, go to bed at approximately the same time each evening. If you're not currently getting enough zzzz's, move your bedtime up 10 minutes each week until you wake before your alarm feeling refreshed. (If you have young children, it may be awhile before you're able to achieve this but it's a worthy goal!)

Nutrition: Good nutrition is always helpful to the body, but even more so when addressing PMS. Women who have more severe symptoms often are sugar-addicts or don't eat regular meals, thereby experiencing mood swings triggered by a sudden drop in blood sugar. Focus on eating lean protein, fiber and complex carbohydrates. In addition, eat small meals every three to four hours to maintain a constant blood sugar level.

See your doctor if your symptoms persist. If the above tips don't help, take your symptom chart to your physician and ask for help. Though diagnosing PMS can be tricky, it will be easier for your physician to work with you if she has your history and a list of your symptoms. Medication may be an option for you. If so, know that dosages can be set low and some prescriptions can be used on an "as needed" basis. Deciding to benefit from pharmaceuticals doesn't mean you have to take a high dosage or be on them forever.

Consider a multi-prong approach. To change your monthly PMS response, adapt a combination of the above ideas. The more multi-layered your approach, the more quickly you'll see positive changes. As you take a proactive approach to your own health, you'll be modeling excellent life skills for your children by showing them the value of exercising, watching what they eat, and getting enough sleep each night.

Remain committed. Though it's not easy to change your response to PMS each month, it is possible. Don't lose heart if you blow up this month and slide into depression next month. Most likely you'll gain control a little at a time. You'll gain confidence as you notice the little changes and this assurance will lead to bigger ones. More than anything it's important to be kind to yourself as you work to change your personal PMS response. Kindness, more than anything, has the ability to change you from the inside out.

Mary M. Byers is popular women's conference speaker and the author of The S.O.S. for PMS: Practical Help and Relief for Moms.